The opinions below are not those of 619Sports.Net. I am not a journalist beholden to any illusions of professional integrity. I am merely a fan yearning for a championship in San Diego.
I know, I know. LT is not a Charger. After nine seasons, however, he’s like family; and at times such a relationship requires commentary.
The interesting thing about family is, no matter how embarrassing they become, they still have a special place in your heart. You don’t abandon them for the tiniest of indiscretions. You don’t judge them like you might a stranger.
These are the little life lessons I’ve learned through curious twists and turns in my life’s path; and by “life’s path” I am referring to the wisdom derived from the films of John Hughes. In fact, it is Christmas Vacation that best provides council in assessing the icon who once wore #21.
LT–by my account–has become San Diego’s cousin Eddie, the character so expertly played by Randy Quaid in 1989’s classic installment of the National Lampoon’s vacation series. Whether it was cousin Eddie slammin’ cheap bear in a blue leisure suit, or emptying his RV’s crapper into the neighborhood sewer, the elicited response of the film-goer was expected to be twofold:
1) Bury face into palm and cringe out of sheer embarrassment.
2) Reluctantly accept uncouth behavior due to family ties.
I’m no Roger Ebert, but that’s what I took from the exchanges between Clark Griswold and his cousin Eddie.
Well, this “cousin Eddie effect” is starting to become familiar to me. Every time ex-Chargers running back LaDainian Tomlinson opens his mouth, I feel like I’m being embarrassed by a relative. I love you LT…but you’re becoming San Diego’s cousin Eddie.
Not that I’m sayin’ we’re going to see LaDainian standing curbside in Poway emptying out his RV into the sewer. Nor am I sayin’ he’s not that bright on account of the steel plate in his head (as far as I know he doesn’t have a plate in his head; only cousin Eddie did).
I’m just sayin’, “Stop talking! Stop embarrassing yourself! Stop embarrassing your fans!”
In his last days as a Charger we had to listen to how he wasn’t being utilized correctly. Upon his first days as a Jet we then listened to a harsh cacophony of Charger linemen being dragged under the bus for not having opened adequate enough holes for the aging veteran. The Chargers O-line wisely took the high road, while LT continued along with the new complaint of retiring as a Charger, if and only if, A.J. Smith was no longer in command.
LT is like family, and my face is buried in the palm of my hand.
I was just whimsically optimistic that LT might contribute to the destruction of the Patriots precisely two times in 2010; apparently his plans are more grandiose. According to his interview with Sal Palantonio earlier this week, he has been tattooed with a Jets logo; guaranteed a Super Bowl victory; and hinted at going to the Hall of Fame as a Jet if he wins the big one.
No, LT! Why!?! Stop emptying the RV in front of the house!
A tattoo? You could get released before you take a meaningful snap. A Super Bowl guarantee? You’re a bit player now, not Broadway Joe. Entering Canton as a Jet? You’re still playing; you shouldn’t even be talking about the Hall of Fame, let alone entering it as a member of a team that took you when your career was on fumes.
This is so embarrassing. LT stands before San Diego. He is dressed in a bathrobe, holding a beer…he empties his RV’s crapper ever so abruptly while we look on in cringing horror, much like Clark Griswold did with his cousin Eddie. We now understand Clark Griswold’s pain.
What we overlook in the name of family.
Mike @ Avenging Jack Murphy.
Check out more of the Avenger in Chief’s hilarious rants on his website, Avenging Jack Murphy.
Craig Elsten -
Chainsaw -
