After the Padres’ losing streak reached seven Wednesday night, Channel 4’s John Weisbarth asked the perfect-haired Bob Scanlan if it was time to push the panic button. Bob said (paraphrasing) if you’re a Padres fan go ahead if you want to, but if the Padres players do they’re toast.
Scanlan made a good point. It’s okay if the fans turn into Chicken Littles so long as the players don’t.
Fans take heart: If last April the baseball gods offered you a three game lead on September 2, would you take it? Uh, YEAH!
But if this current seven-game losing streak still spooks you, it’s downright nothing compared to the longest in sports. Besides, Bud Black is starting the rookie Cory Luebke Friday night, so what’s the big fuss?
In the classic American tradition of laughing at someone else’s suffering (like richer, better-looking, more famous, and more talented people on the covers of People magazine), let’s review the longest losing streaks in sports:
The longest losing streak in MLB history is more than triple the Padres’ current thread. The ’61 Phillies lost 23 in a row. In a town known for its vicious fans, by loss number 15 the hecklers must have run out of material. Just guttural screams and cheese steak belches, which come to think of it is their best material.
The NFL’s longest losing streak belongs to Tampa Bay, the Buccaneers losing their first 26 games over their first two seasons. What was coach John McKay’s response to the question about his team’s execution? “I’m in favor of it.”
The 1981-82 Cleveland Cavaliers began the NBA’s record losing streak by dropping their final 19 games, then losing the next season’s first five to set the record at 24. The Cavs’ current regular season losing streak is four, mostly because LeBron James sat out the final four regular season games. Come to think of it, LeBron will be a DNP for the Cavs forevermore, so an 0-21 start this coming season would break the record.
But these losing streaks are nothing compared to the Caltech Beavers. The Padres would have to lose their final 30 games this season, go 0-162 in 2011, and start 0-16 in 2012 to break sports’ all-time losing streak.
On January 6, 2007, the Beavers’ men’s basketball team snapped a 207-game losing streak to Division III schools, beating Bard College 81-52.
Caltech, otherwise known as the California Institute of Technology, is a private research university better known for its pranks: the two most famous in recent history are the changing of the Hollywood Sign to read “Caltech”, by judiciously covering up certain parts of the letters, and the changing of the Rose Bowl scoreboard to an imaginary game where Caltech beat MIT 99-0.
No such scoreboard pranks were needed to defeat Bard College (which for the sake of this bit we’ll say is a college that focuses on Shakespeare) that January night in 2007. The Beavers (who probably never actually saw one during their collegiate careers) overmatched the Bards with superior nerd-play, bolstered by a boisterous student section that taunted the bards with x-rated chants like “to pee or not to pee” and “farting is such sweet sorrow.” You know, stuff that would make the Cameron Crazies wilt.
So take heart, Padres fans, let not this be your summer of discontent. Your team is 200 consecutive losses shy of this infamy.
To beat Colorado, or not to beat Colorado. That is the question.
Perhaps the noble rookie Cory Luebke hath the answer.
Craig Elsten -
Chainsaw -
